Sunday, May 30, 2010


May 30, 2010

Good evening, friends,

This week I have continued to think about Stafford's haunting lines in "Ask Me":
". . . ask me mistakes I have made. Ask me whether what I have done is my

I have revisited too the way Stafford enters time and life cycle into the question: Ask me, Stafford insists, ask me when the river is in ice. Like you, Lori, I find the image of the frozen ice motionless above the moving hidden current a powerful one.

Stafford (like you, Mark) raises the issue of impact as well. He does this in the context of relationships he has had: others have tried to help or to hurt, he recalls. Then: "Ask me what difference their strongest love or hate has made."

What if we phrased the question in this way: "Ask me whether relationships I have had (have) are my life." Are the relationships we form the doing that tells us who we are?

Thinking with you,



  1. As I read this question tonight, Gay, I wanted you to just tell me if it was my life - you know I like the answers given to me. As I read the other pieces that you had written, I breathed a sigh of relief as you skillfully shared with us what those who have gone before us have done and that it is ultimately what God is doing through me or in spite of me or....

  2. It is interesting that I do chew on your blog through the week and come up with such interesting thoughts and places to go. Thank you for that !
    So yes, I do think that relationships that I have had (have) do tell me something about who I am today, as well as who I have been in the past. They perhaps share both what I have loved and hated and much of the in between. But that is not all -
    I do love the comment that told about the turning crystals in the living room that caught light and shined a rainbow everywhere around them. And that that shining was a representation of how God's love shines through our lives to those around us.
    And so in the winter of my own life, I think that perhaps it is God who should be in charge of my relationships. As I lay them before Him, He knows best where they should go, how long they will hold, and how He will ultimately be glorified in them.
    Now if only I could remember that in the minute by minute occasion of life and learn yet again to get out of the way. Ellie